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How To Establish a Bedtime Ritual That Serves YOU

by | Oct 19, 2020 | Lifestyle

Getting 8 hours of REGULAR nightly sleep is literally what more and more doctors are ordering for their patients, for both prevention and therapy for diseases such as dementia, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and various cancers. Sleep also impacts how we learn and how much we are able to remember, as well as our general demeanor; not getting enough sleep directly impacts our threshold for feeling things like anger and anxiety. Additionally, not getting enough sleep impacts how functional our immune system works–a key point of interest given the current pandemic. There are so many studies that prove it–SLEEP IS MEDICINE. You don’t have to take my word for it; I recommend reading Why We Sleep by Dr. Matthew Walker. Trust me when I say that the insight presented in it is truly eye-opening and life-changing.

My mindset has shifted considerably over the last year regarding my personal sleep hygiene, and I’m so glad. I started becoming more protective of my nighttime sleep, and wow! I noticed a lot of improvements, both immediately and long-term. From being less triggered to actually getting MORE done during my waking hours, getting 8 hours of sleep has been the best thing I could do for myself, because it allows me to do all the other things I want to do to live a healthier, more fulfilled lifestyle, like meditation and being more engaged with my work and family.

So how do you get off the hamster wheel and give your sleep a reboot? Breaking old habits can be very difficult, since doing so involves changing your mindset–literally rewiring your brain. So, the answer is, you make life transformations with a few key understandings:

  • Change happens once, but transformations happen over time. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is your overall mental/physical health. It is the cumulative result of many small decisions over time.
  • It is important to know WHY you want to make a lifestyle shift. If you don’t truly value why you’re doing something, sticking to it will be much harder. If you’re trying to make sure you’re getting your full night of sleep nightly, for example, reminding yourself of why it’s important to YOU personally reinforces your decision, and can often motivate you. If it’s because you want to prevent cancer, remind yourself of that. If it’s because you want to stop being an angry parent, then use that as your why. There is no wrong answer, as long as it’s YOUR answer.
  • You are literally rewiring your brain when you break old habits and create new ones. When doing so, love and kindness towards yourself is important. If you’re constantly telling yourself you can’t do ABC because you’re XYZ, that’s what will manifest. Your words and thoughts carry energy. Use them wisely and with purpose.
  • Progress isn’t linear. It’s circuitous. It’s full of pitfalls and side-tracks. BUT, if you continue to mindfully forge on, with love, kindness and patience, it IS possible.

Now that we’ve established a proper foundation, here’s the rest of the answer:

  • Establish a wake-up time. Factor in tings like desired morning activities, like working out, or drinking a hot beverage quietly, or meditating, into the decision. If you want an hour to yourself before the kids get up, use that to help you establish when you want to wake up. Note that I said “want.” Maybe it seems insignificant, but semantics are important. You’re doing this because you want to, not because you have to.
  • Establish a “be in bed” time. Subtract 9 hours from your wake-up time. That way, you have a full hour to allow yourself to truly wind down, and fall asleep in a positive state of mind.
  • Avoid caffeine, but if you do take some, make sure it’s early in the day, AFTER you’ve had water, and limit how much. I enjoy coffee and tea, but I never have more than one serving, and I limit the sugar. This avoids sugar crashes and promotes dental health. Caffeine has a half life of roughly 5 hours in a healthy adult. This means that if you take a coffee/tea at 2p, you still have HALF of it in your system at 7p. By 9p, it’s STILL in your system. That certainly makes it difficult to feel the need to go to sleep.
  • Get some sunlight during the day, preferably in the morning, when the UV rays are lowest. Not only is this a great way to get your Vitamin D and boost your immunity, but also, it helps keep your sleep/wake cycles on point.
  • Exercise. Moving your body throughout the day helps your body feel the need for rest at night.
  • Avoid eating late dinners. The reason is, the part of your nervous system that is responsible for resting is also responsible for digesting. Just as you can’t possibly have two active conversations at once, your nervous system can’t function optimally if it’s choosing between resting and digesting.
  • Keep your bedroom clean and uncluttered. Your environment directly impacts you. Make sure your sleeping space is one that encourages calm, not one that stresses you out. If you’re staring at a pile of work or your laptop as you head into the room, you’re likely to start stressing about it or start working. By contrast, if your room is uncluttered, there is little else to focus on besides your nighttime ritual.
  • Avoid blue light (light from TV/devices) at least an hour before bed, as blue light blocks melatonin secretion and can mess up the sleep/wake cycles. Particularly, put your phone away. Your mind doesn’t need to be distracted with who did what on the news or on social media. Use a smart home device or stand-alone alarm clock instead of relying on your phone.
  • Dim the lights if possible as bed time nears, as artificial bright light can be disruptive.
  • Do things that encourage sleep: diffusing essential oils like lavender, restorative yoga poses like child’s pose or legs-up-the wall, resonance breathing (breathing in and out for an equal amount of time, or keeping the exhale just a tad longer), reading–all during that hour of “wind down” time.
  • End your day with thoughts of what you are TRULY grateful for. Things that make your heart feel so full it may just burst, not just things you think you should be grateful for. Feel it from the heart. Celebrate what victories you had during the day, no matter how small, rather than fixating on your failures. Going to bed with a positive mindset and gratitude truly sets the tone for the night and sends your body into a state of true bliss. Trust me when I say from experience that the mornings are always brighter when I do this.

I often say that wellness is a web. There are varying aspects to it, and they’re all connected. Once you start to address one area, you may start to notice improvements in another, and be motivated to work on that new area, too. When you pause to reassess things after a period of time, you may see a massive shift in your lifestyle, outlook, and health. Try it, and see what you think! As always, I love to hear from you, dear reader, so don’t be shy and reach out to me! Sending you peace and light.

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