You have a good routine. You’re consistent. Things are feeling good. You’re in “the flow.” You’re showing up in a way that you’re proud of–and kicking butt. And then….you hear it: “You don’t know what you’re doing.” “You are an imposter–you don’t belong here.” “Why would anyone listen to YOU?” “You’re just white noise–you’ll never be outstanding.” “The world is crappy–what’s the point of even trying? It’s not like YOU can make a difference.” All versions of the same, basic message: “YOU’RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.”

It may be a sneaky, barely-audible whisper. Or it may come through loud and clear, like a semi in a head-on collision. Maybe the volume is somewhere in between. It either stops you cold, or you slowly stop doing your thing….and start falling away. Quietly, fading into the background of everyday, mundane existence, acting on the whim of your lower consciousness.

It’s happened to me…and I know I’m not the only one. In fact, this is the first blog post I’ve done in a while. I was supposed to do a post in June about how to find the right coach. Then, Uvalde happened, I got COVID, and then there was the whole Dobbs debacle…and I felt the weight of the world sit on my shoulders. I found myself in total Victim Mode. For those of you who have been coaching clients of mine, you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about. All that Level 1 energy, and I was swimming in it.

I didn’t even realize it had happened, until one day, a dear friend of mine called me out on it. He asked what was going on, and after an entire hour of me justifying and reasoning and excusing, I couldn’t deny it anymore. It was starting at me right in the eyes, and I couldn’t look away any longer.

That’s when the really hard part began. As soon as I recognized the self-sabotaging, it didn’t quiet down. It got louder. No matter what I did or how I thought about it, getting back on the horse seemed really hard and it felt like I had wasted the entire summer not “being productive.” (Ahh, the voice of the Inner Guard (or critic, or saboteur) is ever so encouraging, isn’t it?)

So here’s what I did.

1. I reframed the criticism. Instead of saying I wasn’t productive enough, I celebrated the gifts of the summer and what I did do (spending time with my kids, giving myself a break, seeing family, etc).
2. I got clear on what I want and why. I made a list of things I want to resume that made me feel like I was showing up for a life I wanted to live (gratitude journal, daily morning meditation, yoga, writing, house projects…) Ok, maybe I’m still working on the clarity, but it’s coming, bit by bit. :). Getting coached is super helpful for me (so thanks to my colleague/friend that helped me out with that!)
3. I picked one thing from that list to start doing. Slowly, I added another. I’m still adding. I’m not finished. And, as someone that believes in the power of the growth-mindset, I know I never will be–but I’m at peace with enjoying the journey.
4. I reminded myself that in order to live the life I want, I need to trust that in myself and in the Universe. It’s always worked out. Why is this time any different?

So, here I am–back at it again, writing, blogging, posting. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you did, please share! Maybe, just maybe, you’d be helping someone else get out of their own way and go on to create more purpose and joy. Here’s to YOUR Transformational Success!