Life is scary.  It’s filled with lots of uncertainties and unknowns.  It’s unpredictable, people can be hurtful, and it’s far from fair—especially now.  

We can either push away our fear (How many times have we been told to “Just get over it!”?), or accept fear, and persist? Fear is natural, and it’s there to help keep us safe, but it cannot be something that rules our lives.  A life ruled by fear is a life not lived.

If we push it away, it has the same effect as bottling up other emotions like anger.  It’s pushed deeper and deeper into our subconsciousness, and even though we think we’ve “gotten over” something, it often manifests itself in unexpected ways.

If we meet the fear head on, and accept it, we take away its power.  It no longer holds over us the control it did.  Accepting fear empowers us.  It shows us we can do things we once thought impossible.  It forces positive change and growth.  It makes us a better version of ourselves.  And when we are a better version of ourselves, it’s not just us that benefits.   A better version of ourselves makes the entire universe a better place—we’re all connected; a part of something bigger.

My daughter had some really big feelings of fear as I tried to teach her how to ride her bike without training wheels today, so much so that she refused to get on at all.  It bubbled out of her in tears and the shakes.  Instead of telling her to get over it (as I would have done and have done in the past), I let her sit with it.  I encouraged her to feel it.  To localize it to a specific place in her body, and to send love an acceptance to the fear with her breath.  When she opened her eyes, and I asked her how she felt, she said she felt powerful, like she could handle anything. I was so proud of the work she did to acknowledge her fear and use it to fuel her desire to learn.

I only recently learned about this practice of acceptance, and it has changed my life.  It’s a practice that is simple (not easy) but something we can certainly learn to do and teach our children to do.  If we all practiced acceptance, maybe the hatred and fear that weighs on us will be lifted away by love.